Sunday, January 2, 2011

Things that make you go "huh".

After much internal debate I posted on Facebook this morning about how I had made tomorrow my start date for THE "losing weight" journey. On top of the mysterious rash that no one can agree on what's causing it I've also been dealing with anemia, an aching knee and apparently high blood pressure (which apparently is the cause for the discomforting sensations in my chest that will occur from time to time). In short...I'm a mess! And so I went public (and am doing so once again even though it's a small public for my blog!) in the hopes it would make me more accountable. I'm hoping I'll be a little less inclined to give up...again...if there's the chance that someone will ask me how the journey is going.

But then the thing that made me go "huh" happened. Someone I've been friends with since I moved to Rankin waaaaaaaaaaaay back in 1978 commented that I had one of the strongest sense of will power that she knew. I definitely have never thought of myself in that way. Stubborn maybe but not always in a beneficial way, more like I wasn't going to let some particular annoying people in the past "win" but I never thought of it has having strong will power. She also reminded me she's seen me through some tough times and you know what? She's right. I have gone through some nasty crapstorms but I've always told myself that everyone has so who cares? I'm not going to go all Dr. Phil but there have have been some people in my life who should have been built me up but instead seemed to like chipping away at me instead. But you know what? That was then, this is now. I can let those voices keep whispering away in my head that I'll never succeed so why bother or I can remember that I HAVE (excuse the melodrama here!) sailed through some crapstorms a little bruised and battered but I did survive! Stubborness or will power? Who cares?!

But this does have me wondering do any of us see ourselves as others see us??? How amazing it would be if we did? (Unless people think you're a jerk and then it's probably better not to know! )

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